Positively Positive About Positivity!
Are you sitting down? Well jump up, as our guest blogger, Lauren Puff drops the Mic on a dose of Positivity for us! ...Oh and we are feeling all the feels.
When we think of positivity we might conjure up images of Pollyanna or Parker from Friends in the episode ‘The One In Massapequa’. These saccharine characters are hopelessly and almost unrealistically positive. So positive that we might wonder if they ever have a bad day and if not, we wonder what they’re on and how we can get some.
But being positive isn’t about being naive, avoiding bad things from happening to you, or the absence of hardship. It’s not sticking your head in the sand and keeping your fingers crossed that you don’t get bitten by crabs or washed away when the tide rolls in. Instead, positivity is a practice and a choice that needs to be made daily, often multiple times.
The benefits of having a positive perspective are endless and span the physical, mental, and emotional areas of our lives. People who have a strong positivity practice have better coping skills during stressful times, don’t get sick as often, and often live longer. Let’s also not forget that positivity attracts positivity – imagine the possibilities!
So, here we are with the knowledge that positive thinking can increase our life span and bring more positivity into our lives. Now what? Here are five tips to building your positivity practice and some ideas on what you can do today.
1. Treat Yourself
Treating yourself doesn’t have to mean caviar, limo rides, and edible gold flakes on everything. You can define treating yourself as anything that you want and a great place to start is eating well, getting enough sleep, moving your body, and spending time with things and people who bring you joy. If those things seem like basics, you’re right – once you get down the basics of treating yourself well, you can feel better about treating yo’self.
Consider how great you feel when you’re well rested, eat better than your average American teenager, and took a few inhalations of some fresh air. When you treat yourself well by taking care of your body with enough rest, healthy food, and time outside, you are more equipped to handle tough situations. Treating yourself well also lets other people know how to treat you.
Try today: go for a 10 minute walk with a friend and leave your phones at home or at the office.
2. Fake It Until You Make It
Sometimes we need a little nudge into thinking positively and one way to do that is by speaking positive affirmations or phrases about yourself or a situation. If an affirmation or mantra isn’t your jam, paying yourself simple compliments can be a great place to start because your hair actually does look great today. When we speak positive affirmations or compliments to ourselves we are doubling the number of senses involved – speaking and hearing. This helps create new neural pathways – brain training!
Think of this like creating a new path in a forest. The first time you walk the soon-to-be path you may need to cut back some branches and clear away some brush. You may even need to create a map. The second time you walk the path you will still need the map but the path will be a little bit easier this time because you’ve done a lot of the heavy lifting already. By the fifth or sixth time you walk the path you won’t even need the map.
Try today: before you leave the house, pay yourself a compliment and say it out loud.
3. Meditate
There are many positive effects of meditation and having better access to your positive perspective is one of them because with a calmer mind it’s easier to find. If you haven’t tried meditation before it can seem overwhelming. If sitting in silence with your eyes closed doesn’t work for you, there are several great apps that provide guided meditations – check out Calm, Headspace, or Buddhify.
One thing to remember about meditation is that you can’t do it wrong. Meditation is not about clearing your mind of thoughts. It’s about noticing your thoughts, recognizing you don’t need them right now, and sending them on their way. A great way to help you avoid getting sucked in by your thoughts is to focus on your breath. You can silently recite inhale, exhale as you breathe in and out.
If finding time to meditate with one of the apps feels out of reach or you’re overwhelmed by the choices, consider a different approach to your meditation practice. Knowing that meditation is not about clearing your mind, you can find meditative moments throughout your day – even just a few minutes can make an impact. You can have a meditative moment while doing the dishes, going for a walk, or brushing your teeth.
Try today: on your commute home, keep your phone in your bag, sit quietly, and breathe intentionally.
4. Gratitude
Starting your day with stating something you’re grateful for can positively impact your day and can increase positive thoughts. You can choose something small or big to be grateful for – maybe you are grateful for fuzzy slippers, your favorite song, your hard work on a recent project, your health, or the sunshine. Whatever it is, taking a moment every morning to speak some gratitude out loud can help set your day off on the right foot.
If talking out loud to yourself seems uncomfortable or odd, you can write down what you’re grateful for either in a gratitude journal or even on a post-it note. The goal is to take an intentional moment every morning to claim something you’re grateful for. So, speak it to the universe, your pet, or write it down but claim it.
Try today: take a few moments right now and speak or write down something you are grateful for.
5. Spread The Joy
They say that misery loves company and the same can be said for positivity – it’s contagious. Think back to a social gathering you were at recently – a birthday party or even last weekend at your local bar. Get that image in your head. Bring yourself back to that moment. Who do you find yourself noticing? Who seems to grab your attention? Who do you want to talk to? Is it the person sitting by themselves in the corner or is it the person smiling and interacting with others?
People generally enjoy being around happy and positive people. But before you put unnecessary pressure on yourself to be the life of the party all the time, let’s pull you back and simplify this one and consider something easy you can start with to spread the joy.
Try today: keep your phone in your bag and share an intentional smile and some eye contact with your barista.
Bonus tip: establish a positivity partnership with a friend to help keep each other accountable and motivated.
Regardless of whether you’re just starting your practice from scratch or are a seasoned pro, remember to start small and offer yourself some grace – it takes time to learn something new and that’s why we call it a positivity practice because we practice it every day.
--
Lauren Puff is a certified personal and leadership coach based in San Francisco. She works with both individuals and companies who want to improve relationships with self and others. Lauren is passionate about partnering with her clients to help them find clarity, set and achieve goals, and shaking up the status quo. She works with her clients on topics that include uncovering values and purpose, improving communication, and showing up fully and wholly in life. In her free time, Lauren enjoys working on her yoga practice, researching emotional intelligence, concocting a new smoothie recipe, and daydreaming.